Monday, 23 March 2009

Surreal Life

Today I watched The Horrors play at Rich Mix. I missed the whole buzz with them first time round and only really heard them when Faris came to my night a couple years ago and we became friends. I saw Chris there too and we hung out, hadn't seen him since NME awards. I still find it an odd friendship as we get on so well but I've idolised him for over a decade and used to either hide from him or break out in cold sweats everytime Dario tried to introduce us in previous years. It felt weird seeing them perform Sheena Is A Parasite whilst standing next to him. A little bit surreal.

I had a fun evening however I feel like a sham. I go to these places with literally £1.80 in my pocket and watch everyone swoon around in designer clothes and guzzling down drinks at £5 a pop. I have to try and blag a drink without obviously blagging. I don't feel like I should be here. I really don't feel like I belong here. I have to smile sweetly and be polite when I'm introduced and nod when people ooh and ahh over us being the next big thing (just in Shoreditch of course) yet no one knew about the panic attack I had on the way to the venue and the fact that I hid in the toilets for 20 minutes when I first got there. How do these shiny happy people do it?

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