Tuesday, 31 March 2009

On days like these....

Never get up from under the duvet, shut the curtains, put your favourite Mazzy Star album on, have numerous cups of tea and a long hot bath.

And then pray that it will soon be over.

Raw realisations and emotions HURT.

I'm trying to deal with everything so differently to how I used to but sometimes the old, terrified me creeps back in. I always boast that words are my solace but today reminded me that when I most need them they desert me. Stranded with no way out. The more I try and explain the more confused I get. I've always respected language and words but on days like this, it feels like they are jeopardising me. They turn into weapons and each letter is so loaded, explosive and hostile and the more I turn to them to diffuse a situation, the more uncontrollable they are.

Goodnight and I really hope I wake up to a good morrow. Everyone around me at the moment is really stressed out, upset, ill and I am exactly the same. It really is tough times at the moment. It is during times like these that dreaming is the only way out.

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